This morning, we got out of bed and stripped our sheets. Dobby, however, was not ready to roll, so Lauren snapped a photo of him and sent it to the Goons. Lindsay responded instantly with Mood and That’s how I feel rn. A few moments later, she added, He looks so cheeked up in thatContinue reading “Your Big-Cheeked Butt Is Slappin”
Tag Archives: Children
Follow the Clues
Look carefully. What do you see? You think that’s a belt on the basement stairs, right? How about this? Just a sock on the stairs to the second floor, right? Right? Try this. Have you put the pieces together yet? No? More clues: Clear now? No? Sigh. It looks like household clutter and stuff inContinue reading “Follow the Clues”
Adulting through Car Trouble
Lauren was on the road Saturday to and from Grant’s game. She called me at one point from the wilds of western New York. “Lindsay called me,” she said. “They’re going to Carson’s house in Athens but the Corolla can’t detect the key anymore. That’s just the key fob, right?” “Probably,” I said. “You usuallyContinue reading “Adulting through Car Trouble”
Straight Outta the Burbs
I confess we basically don’t parent Graham. For a few days, he’s been talking about how he is killing it in this sim game called Music Wars Rock Star. So we went out to dinner, and I got him to tell me all about it. You create a character who is a rapper or singer,Continue reading “Straight Outta the Burbs”
The Tomb Is Empty
*This is not a short-short. It’s pretty long. Just fair warning. Patience with this, as well. It may read, at points, like a sermon or a polemic. It’s not. Down the hill and up the trail from Otis and Mercy Warren’s plot is a row of headstones, one of which the man notices because ofContinue reading “The Tomb Is Empty”
The Lost Cause
Lucia is sitting at the kitchen table with books and a Chrome book open. Her hair is tied in a low bun, and when she sees him come in from his workout, she looks up. “Big news, Dad. We have to do a research paper for history class, and one of the options was toContinue reading “The Lost Cause”
In Ramah, Lamentation
The man is in a crowd of people, and he is given a locker room key. The number on the key is 1065. He enters a locker room—it is the old Carroll High School JV locker room. He walks through the locker room and cannot find his locker. He goes through the freshman locker room.Continue reading “In Ramah, Lamentation”
So This Is It
Right after the session they are seated next to each other on a couch in the celestial room. It is summer before what he thinks will be his final two semesters of college when he will finish with an English major and a Spanish minor. But as he sits next to her, he can seeContinue reading “So This Is It”
We’re All a Family and No One is Leaving
“I was just hoping to have a nice family day,” she says, as he moves the minivan onto the ramp to route 24. “What am I doing wrong?” says the man. “You’re just really grouchy. You could be nicer to us.” He rolls his eyes. “I don’t know when you’re going to get this. ThereContinue reading “We’re All a Family and No One is Leaving”
You Can’t Steal My Motorcycle!
Today is the first day of the first trip he will remember. They are in North Carolina for a trial that his father is participating in for the Department of Justice. They are staying at a hotel on the beach. They are barely into the room before the boy and his brother are in theirContinue reading “You Can’t Steal My Motorcycle!”
His Smile Lit Up a Room and Other Things to Say at My Funeral 