Modern Family used to be appointment viewing for Lauren and me—we frequently watched it and another show or two with friends, usually while sharing dinner. A number of its episode themes have become shorthand for us. For example, Lauren had occasion to say to me two weekends ago, “Did I just wedge salad you?” ThisContinue reading “Coke Zero Orange Cream is Delicious . . . Just Ask Carrie”
Tag Archives: Food
The Lonely Grandmothering Preview
The family of Lindsay’s boyfriend, Carson, joined us for the Fourth of July holiday weekend. Our eastern Pennsylvania visitors included, oldest to youngest, Chad, Carrie, Carson, and Griffin. Griffin is entering eighth grade and started the visit off with a bang—he marched in wearing a hideous Philadelphia 76ers hat. Tactical error on his part. “Wow,Continue reading “The Lonely Grandmothering Preview”
Sad Easter
When Lauren was with Lindsay at Lock Haven after the surgery, she realized she had to tend to some Easter matters or she would miss the date. Specifically, she needed to order Mrs. Cavanaugh’s mindy mint Easter eggs for all the kids. Inasmuch as she was in Lindsay’s dorm room and Lindsay was present, LaurenContinue reading “Sad Easter”
How Lauren Is Helping Me Accelerate My Weight Loss Journey
On Sunday, I was in the front yard playing with Dobby when Lauren texted me. L: I’m working on the grocery order for tomorrow. Do you need anything? G: Chicken, steak tips, and vegetables. The stuff I use to prep for lunches. L: Okay Simple enough. I start off weeks by cutting up a bunchContinue reading “How Lauren Is Helping Me Accelerate My Weight Loss Journey”
The Laws Take Some Ls
It was the best of times, it was the worst of times. The week started with immense promise, as Lindsay came home for spring break, Lu and Brayden qualified for base housing, and Grant bought his first meat smoker. Then, it all went to hell. First, I came home from a meeting to find LindsayContinue reading “The Laws Take Some Ls”
Who Learnt Lindsay How to Reed and Spoke?
Lauren’s mother traditionally sends Mindy mints from Mrs. Cavanaugh’s to her kids on Valentine’s Day, Easter, and Christmas. These are usually large mint chocolate hearts or eggs with our names on them. Lauren has started the tradition with our kids and their significant others. They were such big hits with Lindsay and Carson that CarsonContinue reading “Who Learnt Lindsay How to Reed and Spoke?”
A Red-Hot Engagement Anniversary
On Tuesday, Lauren posted about the twenty-fifth anniversary of our engagement, and everyone understood it and congratulated her (and us) appropriately, instead of confusing it for our wedding anniversary, and I am quite irritated about this because I am the clear communicator around here and you all did not understand my post a couple yearsContinue reading “A Red-Hot Engagement Anniversary”
My Failures as a Parent
I have failed as a parent. Oh, I’m sure this picture suggests otherwise. But the failure is embedded in the picture. Can’t see it? I mean, you’re right—it is lovely that our kids like each other enough to get together for the Super Bowl on their own. And we adore both Katy (Grant’s wife) andContinue reading “My Failures as a Parent”
The Elliott Women Are a Mafia Rewriting Our History, and I Am Here to Stop Them
The assault on the memory of Peaceful Meadows continues. Lauren’s sister Lisa is in town to visit her mother, and as a former lover of Peaceful Meadows, she desperately needed to try Porn Star Farms’ ice cream to see if it was a suitable replacement. So we had Grammie and Lisa over for dinner SaturdayContinue reading “The Elliott Women Are a Mafia Rewriting Our History, and I Am Here to Stop Them”
In the Kitchen with the Farmer’s Dog
Meal times used to be sort of tense with Dobby around. He would sit at my feet and beg for food; if I wasn’t timely with delivery, he would yip at me. I gave him tiny cuts of meat—not so much of anything that it replaced the need for his normal food but enough toContinue reading “In the Kitchen with the Farmer’s Dog”
His Smile Lit Up a Room and Other Things to Say at My Funeral 