The man has turned on a Premier League match. Graham is sitting on the gold chair in the corner. Grant is sitting on the ottoman holding the giant Nerf gun he got as a birthday present a few years ago.
He shoots Graham.
“Stop it, Grant!”
Grant shoots him again.
“Stop it! That hurts!”
“Come on, Graham,” the man says. “It’s a Nerf gun.”
Grant shoots him again.
“Grant!”
“Come on, Graham,” says Grant. “Don’t be such a chicken.”
Grant shoots him again, and Graham bellows, “I hate you, Grant! You’re the worst! You’re a … a … a ROOSTER!”
His Smile Lit Up a Room and Other Things to Say at My Funeral 
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