One Weird Trick to Save Your Relationship

Having been married continuously to one woman and no one else for nearly twenty-five years and being the father of two married or getting-married children, I am in an excellent position to give marital advice, and obviously my advice is needed now more than ever. And with my robust following of approximately six readers, I have both the power and responsibility to make a difference. Everyone ready? Good.

Here is the one weird trick to a long and successful relationship. You can practice this early and often in any relationship but particularly in those you hope to hang on to. There are three words at the heart of all successful marriages and relationships, and you can use them as early as the first meeting.Oh, I know what you’re thinking: isn’t that a little early for such a big commitment? And you would be wrong.

Here are the three little words: You. Were. Right.

Now, as it happens, I am good at using those words, but I am also right. A lot. And I love hearing that I was. So I am going to take this chance to call out some recent occasions when I was right.

I wrote a while back that our new garbage and recycling service was going to be a disaster. Well, just look at this recycling piling up in the garage.

Soon, no one will be able to get in the back seat of the car. What’s worse is that the existence of the pile is self-perpetuating. We didn’t put our recycling out last week because we were afraid of how much there was. We promised ourselves we would take all of it to the transfer station on Saturday. Of course, we lied about this. Now, Lauren has started slipping recycling into the trash and telling me to do likewise because she is a climate-killing tree hater who loves feeding plastic to whales. I don’t know how we will get past this, but I know for sure I was right.

The other day I wrote about how we should all enjoy our surroundings and find beauty in them. Well, Brayden took it to heart. He is on a naval ship now and sent us back a video of dolphins swimming with the ship. Just watch and listen to this NatGeo-quality video. Be sure to note the joyous commentary at the end that helps show I was right!

Likewise, some locals took joy in our recent snow. In particular, the elementary students at the local school said to themselves, “We find joy in playing in the snow! And you know what this fresh recess field of snow fall needs? A rocket!” So they made one as you can see in this photo.

I also noted for you that my name is G-O-R-D-O-N and that people frequently butcher it. Just this week, my sister-in-law Lisa wrote me this: Hahaha! Saw it this time. Thanks gorson. Despite Lisa claiming “you love it,” I do not and she is wrong and I am right! So while I hate having my name butchered, I get the joy of being right about its frequency and how I feel about it!

So that leaves me with a challenge to you. Go out and try it today! “Hey! You thought this shirt would look great on me and you were right!” or “You said Michigan was going to cheat its way to a national championship and you were right!” or “You said this meal looks bad but would taste great and you were right about at least one point!” See how great your partner feels when being affirmed!

And when you finish the assignment, feel free to post a public acknowledgment: Gordon was right! (But please get the spelling right!!)

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