Take the Trash Out, Please

Graham is sitting on the couch watching a Minecraft video on an iPad.

“Hey, bud, could you take the trash out?” the man says.

“No,” he says without looking up.

The man sighs. “Let me rephrase that. Take the trash out.”

“Uggghhh. Why?”

“Because it’s full and it’s your job.”

“Why can’t Lindsay do it?”

“It’s not Lindsay’s job. Lindsay has other jobs.”

Lindsay is sitting in the kitchen working on a new batch of slime, but now she is paying attention.

“I always have to do everything!” Graham yells.

“I mean, that’s just objectively and demonstrably false,” says the man. “But it’s okay. You can sleep in the shed tonight instead.”

With a huge groan, Graham slams the iPad down on the couch.

“It’s not fair! Lindsay’s not doing anything!”

Lindsay suddenly bolts up from the kitchen table. “Shut up, Graham! You never do anything. Everyone does everything you’re supposed to do!”

The man looks at Graham and says, “Just get up and take the trash out.”

Graham stands and bellows, “I like it a lot better when everyone does everything for me!”

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